Bumps

Driving along during the week I noticed these 2 strange mounds in the countryside. While my first thoughts were they looked like breasts (well I have been away from home for 2 months now) I soon realised that there were several more of them in a row. It turns out that these are part of a unique 5000 year old history of the early inhabitants.

Known as barrows, there are over 500 in the Dorset area. They are not all round. Some are long mounds, some up to 500 metres long. There is very little known about why they were made but some are related to burial sites where others are though to be as simple as defining boundaries of land ownership. It is amazing that even after 5000 years of habitation with wars, farming and buildings that some of these still remain.

I still think they were more likely the first attempts at large scale pornographic sculpture but dont worry - Kathy arrives in 5 days!

It is interesting to see why the English have such a strange view of us Ozis when the main media stories about Australia are like these in the last few days:

Air stewardess: secrets of my five-mile high sex romp with Ralph Fiennes (Front page of the Morror Rag 17 Feb) - about the Qantas stewardess who tells how she fell for Hollywood star in Seat 2K...and how after a mad, passionate fling he abandoned her

Strewth! Australia rocked by 'lesbian' koala revelation (25 February Indapendant) "Scientists monitoring the marsupials with digital cameras counted three homosexual interactions for every heterosexual one. Female koalas indulge in lesbian "sex sessions", rejecting male suitors and attempting to mate with each other, sometimes up to five at a time, according to researchers."

And we all do this dont we.......

Drunken Australian catches shark with his bare hands (16 February 2007) "A man fishing for squid with friends off a jetty at Louth Bay, South Australia who caught a four-foot shark with his bare hands off an Australian beach today said he only did it because he was drunk on vodka. "I just snuck up behind him, and eventually I went for the big grab and I fluked it and got him,"

No wonder they think I am strange

Rugby UNION

I have never really tried understand the conflict in Ireland before however sitting and watching a game of rugby this weekend between Ireland and England (part of the 6 Nations contest) I began to get a taste of some of this history.

While Ireland may play as one team it was interesting to watch the Irish National Anthem (Amhrán na bhFiann) being played with several players not singing. Many Nationalists regard the song as the national anthem of the whole of Ireland, and it is therefore sung at football games in the Republic of Ireland. Unionists, however, reject this use of Amhrán na bhFiann and dont sing. At international games played by the all-Ireland Irish Rugby Football Union team the song Ireland's Call is sung as well as.

This game was equally unusual because of the venue. Croke Park was an exclusive citadel for Ireland's traditional sports, rich in the folklore of hurling and Gaelic football. Even as recently as last year it was thought that the twain would never meet 'twixt the likes of hurling and rugby union’.

What makes this event even more emotionally charged was it was a game against England. This was the first time an English team had set foot in the stadium and would be the first time that ‘God save the Queen’ would echo out over the field.

And Croke Park had its own direct experience of the horrors of previous violence that faced this land. It is scarred by the events of November 19, 1920, the scene of Bloody Sunday when British paramilitaries gatecrashed the stadium. Tipperary were supposed to be playing Dublin. Instead 14 people were shot dead by British paramilitaries including the player Mick Hogan.

So this momentous match was viewed by some observers here as a watershed, a crossing for the troubles-free modern Ireland accepting its English neighbours. Even in the pub where I watched the game there was a surreal atmosphere as Irish and English supporters stood side by side singing their national anthems.

Tickets were selling for $4,000 Australian dollars and there wasn’t an empty seat in a stadium that holds 82,500. In a stadium so central to Ireland’s cultural identity it was promising to think that future battles would only occur on the sporting filed. As an Ozi watching the game, it has given me new understanding not only on the passion they have for sport but the immense history that exists in this place.

Name that village

When I first found out we were moving to Buckland Ripers I thought it was a strange name. Now that I have been here for a while it is nothing compared to some of the villages that I have driven through. Yes - obviously not having the family here is giving me too much free time but I thought I would look at my local Dorset Map and give you a flavour of where you could live:

There are some towns where I think they have tried to joint two of the most obscure words together such as Alton Pancras; Bere Regis, Child Okeford; Corfe Mullen; Fifehead Magdelen; Fontmell Magna; Lytchett Matravers; and Sixpenny Handley.

And if joining two words was not enough why not three: Gussage All Saints; Frome St Quintin; Milton on Stour; Monkton Up Wimborne; and my favourite, Three Legged Cross.

Alternatively others seem to be just a whole lot of letters together in no particular order: Morcombelake; Owermoigne; Ryme Intrinseca.

There are some that sound like a medical disease such as Bloxworth; Clapgate; Furzebrook; Holditch; Poxwell.

Others sound like a cocktail such as Kings Stag; Plush; Uploaders.

Then there is the fascination with water with names such as Affpuddle; briantspuddle; Puddletown; Piddlehinton; Piddletrenthide; Tolpuddle; and Turners Puddle

A few that just sound stupid such as Toller Fratrum and Toller Porcorum

Atleast some villages sound nice and have an animal connection: Bearwood; Birdsmorgate; Goathill; Wynford Eagle.

A Mr Tarrant must have had a few wives with Tarrant Crawford; Tarrant Gunville; Tarrant Hinton; Tarrant Keynestone; Tarrant Launceston; Tarrant Monkton; Tarrant Rushton

Leaving the best to last I know Australia is considered the land down under but there is: Asick Bottom; Happy Bottom; Backside; Bottom Head; Bogend; Buttock Point; Pratts Bottom; Butt Hatch; Burnt Bottom; Handcock's Bottom and out the other end - Crapstone.

As you can tell I got excited so I decided to start looking further afield in the UK for strange place names. Guess what......

The male anatomy gets a good exposure with Sandy Balls; Cock Bridge; Cocking; Cocklick End; Cockpole Green; Cockermouth; The Hard; and if one is not bad enough how about, Three Cocks.

The girls are not missed either with: Muff; Muffworthy; Thong; Thrashbush; Shaggs; Lusty Hill; Titsey and Titty Hill

OK I could spend all night going through the maps so I have to stop here but one thing is for sure - Australia is a great place to live and I am glad that I will never live in Bitchfield; Dead; Dogdyke; Fattahead; Foul End; and Nasty.

What a funny Country!

Bath anybody?

Another weekend and another chance to get out and see the country. This time I jumped on the train and headed to Bath. While the City itself is lovely, one of its main attractions are the Roman Baths. The Bath springs are the only hot springs found in the UK. Water rises here at the rate of over a million litres a day within the courtyard of the Temple of Sulis Minerva and water from it feeds the Roman baths which were built in 43 AD (along bloody time ago!)


Since the roman times the baths have undergone lots of changes as people continued to use them for healing and relaxation but it is amazing to think that you are walking on the original paving slabs around the Baths. Exhibits and Roman artifacts include a famous stone relief of the Gorgon's Head, mosaics, stone coffins, and a gilded head from a statue of Sulis Minerva.


Amazingly it is not just 1 pool but a series of rooms each with its own purpose. Roman bathing was based around the practice of moving through a series of heated rooms, saunas, and baths culminating in a cold plunge at the end.

So here endeth another history lesson.

Something old

OK - I know it is a daggy photo but it is not very often you get to play with something that is 360 years old and made out of gold. I am holding the Council Mace. It was throught to have been made in 1649 so you will see I am holding on to it tight as I am not sure if that is how I wanted to be remembered at Council if it had dropped.

The mace is a throwback to time when ancient clubs was used as a weapon of war. Later they were used by bodyguards of royalty and decorated with gold or silver. Over time they became less of a weapon and more a symbol of authority. Since it was first made in 1649 the Council mace went through several changes bwith more gold pieces added. It is still used in ceremonies today. Lucky I did not get to wear the Mayoral robe behind me as well!

ps: hope everyone noted that I am not wearing a tie.

A Weekend Walk

The weekend may have brought rain, wind and a max of 6 dec C but that was not enough to stop an 18km walk around the Portesham countryside. Lovely green rolling hills, mud, cows, views across Lyme Bay, more mud, wild deer, crisp sea air...did I mention mud? We stopped for a break at a little shed that also doubles as a grandstand across a local cricket pitch. Mind you, the pitch was more home to cows and a cover drive would mean you were hitting up a 20 deg slope…. Maybe our Australian cricket team needs to come and do a bit more practice here?

Home away from Home

I must say one advantage of the family not being here is that you get to spend a lot more time in the pub. They come in all shapes and sizes but all have their own unique character. Some are specially designed for me with 5 foot ceilings (bad luck Hux). I think I mentioned before I am starting to enjoy the 'bitter'. Most pubs their own local brew or one from with the local area. I hope you all have noticed the photo and the name of the pub on the bottom row?

Morning time

With the forecast of clear skies I thought I would get up early and watch the moon go down and the sun come up over the bay - winter can be nice.

Happy Birthday to me!

Had a great birthday weekend which started on the Saturday going to a game of soccer (oops sorry) FOOTBALL with the GM from work. The game was Southhampton (Saints) vs Derby. With the Saints in red and white like the Sydney Swans I had to go for them - but then again I did not have a choice. It is amazing that the segregate the fans. I was sitting in the Saints area and if I had of made and cheer for the other team they would remove you (or the fan next to me would have done something worse!).

It was a good game (unless you were a Saints fan who lost 1-0). I loved the chants that would go around the ground and the songs they would sing – different to Australians who are a rabble. There were almost 28,ooo fans there + another 22,000 security. It amazing the number of security and police – Where the two groups of fans meet in the stand there was a row of security and police standing shoulder to shoulder. No wonder there is so much crime in the UK as all the police are at football grounds.

The next day went to a lovely National Trust property, Kingston Lacy. The gardens are open for 2 weeks due to the snowdrops. Then in the afternoon another walk along the coastline then to my bosses place for dinner. A fun time.